You're simply awesome

Dear Jovial,

Let papa say I love you first before I wish you a "Happy Birthday" and may the good Lord continue to bless you with good health and great wisdom.

Son, you are now 16 officially already today, a big boy now or should I say a teen already, you have your own thinking,sometime much to my dislike but hey what the hack like I said you are a big boy now.

Dear son, there have been many occasions when we went on "cold wars" but I believe just like me, you too know that papa loves you truly.

Like many of the teens, I know you hate long winded speech,therefore I am going to make it very simple and nice,, I love You Son and Happy Birthday to You.........and remember you can always run to me if you need covers...............

P/S : I Love You  Jo

A tale of two tumblers.......................

Just some simple words, just a few brief moments of showing concern,that's suffice to make me happy...

Jovial asked me two weeks if he could change his tumbler to a bigger one, I said okay and told him that I would get my friend to get him the "Tupperware' brand one.

A week has passed and my friend still has not sent me the tumbler yet and one night over the dinner Jovial asked me when would he get his new tumbler,I said don't know then I offered him mine which is of 1.5 liters one,he declined then he said something that was really warm.

He said,"Papa, never mind lah, I'd wait for the new one cos you need your big tumbler more than I do and you are always on the run,you need to drink more water "

Those ways coming from my 16 years old son really warmed my heart,he might not even realized it that those uttered words were like seeing the water in the desert..

I really love to see my sons growing up with loads of tender,loving care and I am sure with such traits that will go far in their respective chosen paths..

P/S : Thank God for my boys

True to his words........

As I was sharing in this post about how Jovial was telling his friend the so called how to "improve" on his Ad Math.

You see last term exam Jovial had a dismay result of lower than 27 marks for his Ad Math,he knew and conceded that in fact result was indeed bad.

Two weeks ago,he obtained his Ad Math result from his latest exam, to my surprise and to the of my lovely wife's, Jovial did very well for this subject, he scored 72, the exact opposite of what he got from the previous exam.

I must admit,Ad Math is not as easy as Simple Math but to see Jovial admitting his weakness and putting extra effort into scaling new heights, it just amazes me.

P/S : Well done...Just believe you can

Motor Bike.......................

Last two weekends, I borrowed a bike from my brother in law and took Jovial to an open space and helped him to learn to ride a bike.......................

He managed it well,despite his maiden try at riding a bike and I am sure he loved riding too but now my concern is such like this.

My wife has objected to Jovial using the bike as the mode of transport to go to school, she said we were exposing him to great risk, I tend to agree with her but then again,what if Jovial insisted that he wanted to,just like his peers who could ride bikes to school?

Now parents like myself and many of you out there have more worries than your parents,my mom was never  worried about me cycling or riding a bike to school, she never controlled my going out and having fun but now we are all so scared.

Jovial is 16 now..............but we are still worried, can let him ride to school or not,when his time of getting a bike license finally comes/

P/S : We have lost that 'safety" feeling.............................

5 days have passed.........

Though the rashes remain,albeit not so evident anymore and I made him skip school today,(after his exam though) and tomorrow being holiday,I did it because I wanted Jovial to have good rest.....

Doctor said that I should monitor for a week,if there was blood in his urine,thank God,there has been no sign of it since the last visit to the doc...

Thanks for the concern and words of encouragement

P/S : Faith reigns

I prayed,I cried and I lost sleep.............

Jovial has been having rashes a few days now,so last night, I took him to see doctor and the doctor had a check on him and he said.........................

He said, his rashes were not due to allergy nor was it due to heat,he then gave me one medical jargon that I have never heard before and it was Nephrotic syndrome,I was thinking what the heck it was and when he explained it,it sent chill down my spine but I tried to keep my composure cos Jovial was present.

The doctor asked me to monitor his urine for one week,if there was blood in the urine,then I had to send it for further tests..........................

When I came back, I called out to Jovial and Marvell( their mother was back in her hometown) and we began to pray and I cried,suddenly I felt so helpless and suddenly I thought what I needed to do was to surrender to the Almighty.................

You know the first thing I woke up (actually I didn't really sleep) was to check on Jovial rashes.........

So for the whole of this week,all that I needed to do................keep the faith.

Note : Nephrotic Syndrome is damage of the kidneys

P/S : .......................................................................

So sweet............

Last week, when I told Jovial that I might be suffering from high blood pressure, cos my record showed 156/98 and I told him that I chose not to get angry with him and told him that I truly loved him, I could see that his eyes were welled up with tears.

At night, my wife told me something like this,"You know, Jovial told me this before he went to sleep, he said,from now,we must not let papa be angry, he is old already, we must take care of him....."

P/S : Love can conquer all

Of late............

Of  late, I tried to understand that he is so called "in the transition period" from boyhood to manhood, seriously I tried but it is like a period that we both are engaged in a "cold war"....

We seldom talk now, not that we used to, we don't do things together now, not that we used too, so it is all about that he is 16 now.

I do believe that he has got good heart but at the same time, he has some ways need to be corrected too, so how? I can't be harsh,(cos it will back fire), I can't be too soft either.

Please share with me.........

P/S : It is harder than I thought

Well done Jo.......

Yesterday a few friends called me up to ask about Jovial's PMR result, I told them I was extremely happy with his result.

I am so proud of him,simply because for a guy who did not  go for tuition classes, who once plunged to the last two bottom in the class, finally emerged with such a splendid result.

"You live your life and nobody is going to live it for you" has always been my advice to my two boys, of course,there have been times,when I could be very strict with them,I guess there was to instill in them the good values, that's all.

Looking back,since Jovial plunged to the lowest 2 in the class and that was just a few weeks away from his PMR, I could see that he was determined to "make it up" for himself again and indeed he did.

Note : Please don't ask me how many As he scored for he is a kind of person who does not like to "heboh heboh" or to trumpet one........all I could say is that I am extremely proud of him.

To my sons,"If you fall the 100th time, get up and shout it out,here comes the 101th"

有志者，事竟成

P/S : Wealth can be stolen but knowledge stays within forever

This should suffice

Having some rough times with Jovial for the past few days,you know dealing with a teen is not easy at all,but looking at Jovial,one thing for sure that this son of mine is growing up quick and is beginning to have his own "thoughts and opinions"

Yesterday,I was so called,"exterminating" the mosquitos in his room,when my wife saw it,she went over to the kitchen and was telling this to Jovial when he was preparing dinner for us," Do you know that your papa loves you a lot?" he responded by saying he knew it too

 I am glad that he said that,as long as he knows that I love him,all that good or bad that comes along the way not matter how trivial or insurmountable,with love and prayers,we will be doing fine.

 P/S : As long as you know that I love you

Just when I thought he knew.......

To me this is really hilarious. I was having dinner with Jovial and Marvell the other night,(my wife was down in Singapore for a seminar)

 Date : 13/08/2012
 Time : 6.45 PM
 Venue: Shalom Coffee shop, Farlim

翁翊，“爸爸，今天有没有女孩子来月经？

 爸爸，“为甚麽你这样问？

 翁翊，“女孩子的月经不是月底才来的吗？“

 爸爸，“不同女孩子来月经的日期是不同的“

 Jovial," Papa,are they any girls having their "period" today?"
I was really very confused to what he was saying,so I asked again.

 Eugene," Why did you ask that?"
 Jovial,."I thought the period for girls came only at the end of the month?"

 Just when I thought he knew,this was coming to be so surreal,more needs to be thought Have a great long holiday guys

 P/S : I shall continue to teach

He went "wow" when I said Karl Marx.............

You know one of the greatest joy of being a papa, is when your children look up upon you like a hero, this joy is sometimes indescribable. So the sharing goes.........................

I was accompanying Jovial while he was reading on the subject of History, I was there because firstly I love to be for him when he encountered problems with History, ( you know they say History is boring) I was there for him to prove that the opposite is true.

So, as he went along, questions after questions came and as he touched on the topic of Communist Party of Malaysia, I shared with him Chin Peng, shared with him the " darurat"(curfew) , the British and all that surrounded the CPM, then out of sudden, Jovial asked me..............

"Papa, who founded communism ?" I knew this got more interesting already cos the part was not discussed in his textbook and I was happy that Jovial was showing his interest in History already so I snapped by fingers viola I said," By a German sociologist Karl Marx"

After saying Karl Marx, Jovial was like laughing away and was in the state of ecstasy as if he saw a Superman suddenly appearing in his presence out of no where,, when I looked into his eyes,without words I knew.he laughter clearly indicated that, "Papa, you are so geng lah"

After a brief moment of laughter, I said to him,"Papa is good leh, now only you knew that History can be interesting,kan?" He simply nodded.

You know there's one thing I truly believe now,if we were to be there for our children, accompanying them ,while they are studying and telling them the truth (when you really don't even know the answers for their questions" they will find more joy in studying.........................
P/S : Thanks Jovial for at least once you made me feel like Kent

" I will be all right in a few years time"

Jovial said this to me," Papa, you know lah, I am a teen now, a bit difficult but give me a few years, I will be all right, love ya"

I said to him, "Son, I am your father who loves you dearly, I will still have to tell you if I think you are wrong and I would love to see you growing up to be a fine young man"

P/S : Episode ended,curtain down and standing ovation

Jovial,Sodomy and Me..........

I picked my Jovial up from school yesterday,in the car,heading for lunch,he then suddenly asked me this," Papa, so how is Anwar case?" then again abruptly,he asked again,"Papa,what is sodomy ?"

Thinking to myself,could he have known the meaning of "sodomy" already but just to put me to test,or he really did not have any clue about it. Whenever I am faced with difficult questions from my two boys,almost all the times,I don't and I won't evade the questions or simply blush them off but this time,I was really lost,not that I didn't know but just that I did not how to put forth to him.

I was thinking should I use the words,such as,"copulation","sexual intercourse","having sex" or simply"fuck" just to begin with. I then chose..................

I said this,"Jo,you see son, "sodomy" is not normal sexual intercourse",it is again the law" he then asked,"Why against the law?" I was pushed to the corner by my 15 years old boy but then again, wanting to get it done and over it quickly,I said this.............

"Jo,sodomy is someone fucks someone's backside" without asking if he knew what I intended to tell him, I said,"So,you want to have chicken rice or fried rice for lunch,son?"

Note : How would you tell you boys about it?

P/S : Son, we will talk about it again,I promise you this,ya

Boy to Man.............................

I am glad that we can joke about this, I am happy that he can share this with us and I am loving it cos this family of mine does have some sense of craziness and joy that envelopes the whole household,albeit some fighting at times but all is good though.

When I came back from a meeting last night, I was fooling around with Jovial and Marvell before bed time, then suddenly I asked about his hair, ya those secret hair, I then asked,"Jovial, your hair came out already or not?" He being as cheeky as ever,gave some crazy dance moves and telling us,"got already lah"

To me it is another milestone as being a father, now that my boy has turned out to be a man,(hahahahahah) but then again, I should learn to handle this now man with different kind of approaches that he is not a boy anymore...............guess I am learning.

You know sometimes I really feel I am being a little too hard on him, he being the firstborn,glad that he can still call me a "papa" honored that he does still want to hold my hand sometimes when he is sleeping,guess that I should respect him that I should not insist of holding his hands in publice but then again all is good.

Just another thing though, I really really hope these two boys of mine(oops sorry one boy and one man) will grow up to have strong bonding as brothers and good buddies and I am thankful to God for them.

Son, you have given me so much joy and so much frustration along the way.
At times, I hope you can understand me but you would say likewise to me.
Sometimes it hurts when you act like a man, making feel like a boy.
Your nonchalance breaks me,when I say things that are not music to your ears.

Anyway,my consolation shall always be,you would still hold out to me
I still enjoy those silly punches you land on my tummy,
Tell you a secret, I enjoy kissing you on your cheeks without you knowing it.
Cos I am afraid you might not like it,when I do it openly, so please forgive me

P/S : Now that he is a man,now that I want to be a better dad

I know that he loves me truly..........

Just two nights ago, as I was lying on the bed with the bone aches all over me,trying hard to get some sleep, I slowly raised myself up from the bed (Jovial was playing games with his notebook pc next to me) as I wanted to get another mattress to the living hall.

Jovial saw me stricken with pain as I tried to get hold of the mattress,he quickly said this,'Papa,let me help you to transfer the mattress to the living hall." On that particular moment.despite his sometimes sarcastic comments he makes about me I really felt like the happiest guy in the whole wide world.

P/S: Sometimes when you give out love, that love reciprocates itself in most wondrous ways,so don't stop giving out love

Please say likewise to me,Jo....

Yesterday,when Jovial and Marvell came up from their swimming session,it was already about 7.40 PM, at that time my wife was busy preparing dinner in the kitchen, when Jovial saw his mother in the kitchen, I heard this coming from him to his mother, he told his mother this.

He said," Mommy,do you know that I love you a lot ?" I took at peek at them when that took place and I saw him hugging his mother while she was preparing the dinner, at one point I was happy because my 14 years old son has got no qualm in showing his love,albeit it privacy but on the other hand,he very seldom says that to me and I am jealous,hahahhahah.

So when he came out from his kitchen, jokingly I asked him why did he not say the same to me,then he replied,"Papa, we are man,ma" Sigh..................................................

P/S : I am convinced that there is so much love in my boys............

Nothing can be sweeter than this................

Jovial my 14 years old called me last evening,he said," Papa. We are going to meet uncle Jiro (who is our dear Japanese friend,who happens to be in Singapore)for dinner later,you take care and I Love You" I responded," Love you too,take care and enjoy ya"

What can be sweeter than this,my Jovial saying "I Love You" to me,even before I said it to him(Usually I will be the first one saying,he would just reciprocate likewise) but yesterday,he said it first that just gave me something to sleep on the last night.

You see this is the great part about blogging,I just put down in words my joy,my sorrow,my malaise,my happiness,store these memories in electronic archive, and one day I must just "click it" open and savor once again reliving those memories .

So for those of who think we bloggers are some kind of lunatics,try it and we will know why we do what we do, dear fellow bloggers,you guys agree with me?
I am sure my wife was so happy to have met up with Jiro after such a long time,you can tell by her faceOur dear friend Jiro Muraki (we will surely see you in the near future in Tokyo) and My two wonderful boys........................

P/S : I Love You too .........Jo

The science of favortism

You know there is a saying in Mandarin that goes like this, “你最深爱的人，伤你最深“ the one you love the most,hurt you the most...........

Admittedly, I do have a little favoritism towards the first born over the second,so admittedly again,sometimes I am not being equal to the both of my boys as I wish I could have or always shall be but the stark fact is that's so true that I do have favortism.

It was on a late Saturday evening, I told Jovial that it was time for him to stop playing online game and rest cos it had been few hours straight playing just that.online games. (Maple Story),he was not kind of happy at my instruction but he gave in nevertheless.

Instead,he turned on the TV, I told him to get to sleep again and I told him that I needed to sleep too cos I needed to get up very early to go for my run, I requested him to turn off the light
as well, he said he didn't want to, again I told him papa could not sleep with the light on and he said,"that's my problem"

To me,"that's my problem" is a great blow to me, my 14 years old son smacked me with that statement and without hesitation I told him straight to his face that I was indeed hurt by that statement.

I don't know may be it was because I have been molly coddling him subtly without me even realized it all this while because he was the first born or because I have been giving him to much to his requests..................

P/S : S**t my son said that to me

It is okay son....and this one's for you...

I am sorry son,at times,when you feel kind of "pai sei" with me,when I act a little crazily, when I turn my 'sour face' at you,when i say a lot of NOs to you and you don't even know why,when you may ask"can my papa be a little nicer to me ?" when I am not and I am sorry when times I fail to keep up to my words.

But then again,I thank you my son,for giving me so much joy for being your dad,thank you for you've never uttered the words,"I hate you" thank you for you still wanting to reach out to hold my hands when you sleep and thank you for asking me to accompany you for a little while till you are far away from sleeping.......just thank you son. The joy of being your Papa,is to know that you can be good and you can be bad,you can be naughty and cheeky and you can be nice and lovely and when all that is said and done,I hope you can be proud of me as much as I am proud of you.

"Happy 14th birthday,Jovial" I love you and may the Good Lord continue to guide you with godly wisdom........................

P/S: 当你一天一天的成长，当我一天一天的变老，你永远都会是我心上的宝，有时你会高飞，有时你会跌倒，不怕，爸爸会呵护你，让你再一次的跑，再一次的飞高。也许有一天，你懂得比我多，我懂得比你少，请你别嫌弃我，因为爸爸给你的爱，永远少不了。。。。。。。。。。。