I love her, she loves me, we get married, have sex, then babies, babies became boys and girls and now boys and girls become young teens and suddenly we realized that marriage or parenthood was not that rosy.
Ok, don't get me wrong, I have no problem about my marriage and as parent, it is about something i would like to share as a husband and a father, which suddenly struck me yesterday evening.
I went for my 1 and half hour run yesterday, done with it, it was already 6.45 PM, usually at this time i would wait for my lovely wife down at my apartment to help her to carry her PC and some stuffs after a hard day's work.
Whenever i am done with running, i would like to have a few beers sometimes enjoyed together with my lovely wife, just to chill out and the problem is Jovial does not like it and he will always shows us his displeasing look and begins to act nonchalantly towards me.
When this happens, I get mad but yesterday it suddenly dawned upon me that if i got mad at Jo,it will spoil the mood of my lovely wife and tense atmosphere would prevail. I really did not want to do that for i knew after a hard day's work, all my lovely wife wanted was a calm and soothing air for her to breathe.
I say it again, it is not easy being a working mom, so many emails to read, so many problems waiting to be resolved, so much of children's homework to be worried about and worst still if my lovely wife still have to worry about my untimely and capricious erupt of my anger, then i think she will have no air to breathe, no air to relax and no air to have a nice remaining evening to rest her tired body,mind and soul.
Therefore, I cannot be selfish enough to get myself worked up with anger and malaise,thus toss my lovely wife into the web filled with thunderbolts of uneasiness and frustration, just because my "happy hour" is spoiled, i just can't be that selfish, can I?
Sometimes, it is really not nice to "hurt" someone with our own selfishness, moreover it would only be cool to let our spouse to have some pleasant air to breathe instead of being chocked and suffocate herself with no air, no air.
P/S : Sometimes it is less of me, more of her for she deserves better
me too..i dislike my husband's drinking..
ReplyDeleteNo air.. it's an expression to mean that you don't have any air space to breathe right?
ReplyDeleteAnyway it's good that you're thinking for everyone. Getting angry and disturbing the peace of the family should be the last resort.
Why not try to bring Jovial into the circle of love whenever he makes that face. :)
I don't like my hubby to drink, but once a week I think still acceptable. He also has his own stress from works, and I understand he needs to chill out with his friends also...
ReplyDeleteWow... god gracious!! You actually wait for your wifey to coma back home and help her to carry the luggage, what a wonderful husband you are!^^
ReplyDeleteWait a sec... if I were you, I'll never drink in front of my kids(harsh words huh?), respect their feeling (especially I think he is right) and their will respect u as well! You are a great dad, but sometimes we really need to listen to the little one... for your good shake friend!:)
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ReplyDeleteSpelling errors* Their= they; shake= sake!:p
ReplyDeleteI were like you, quite selfish when come to my happy hours. My happy hours are going online to check email, FB and read blogs. I were quite mad when my kids came out from bed and intterupted my happy hours. My husband would feel the tense too, like you described here, no air. I guess I also have to control my temper and not to be so selfish already. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteI have not come to not having time yet, I'm enjoying every bits of it ;D
ReplyDeleteViolence begets violence...and anger gets one nowhere. Your son does not like you drinking, so maybe you should stop. Limit to maybe special occasions.
ReplyDeleteI used to drink but my daughter would make me promise that I only drank one glass only. Then beer started giving me gout...so I do not drink anymore.
Maybe instead of beer, go for something else equally nice? perhaps Jo doesnt like the beer bec he thought it is unhealthy for both of u.. seriously..
ReplyDeleteI dislike my dad to drink too. He cut down a lot due to health reasons. Hubby don't drink but only did on special occasion.
ReplyDeleteAnd thks for this reminder. I shall give hubby some space for the said fresh air to breath after a hard day at work.
My kids are still young... they always interfere in my activities. Every hour is a happy and busy one. Initially I got frustrated when there was tantrums from the children. Now already getting used to their antics.
ReplyDeleteWhy choose to be unhappy when I can be happy :)
You are a very understanding husband who always consider the feeling of your better half, hard to find liao.
ReplyDeleteKids need attentions most of the time. If they don't need our attention, they could be hiding something from us.
laaa....the title i thought tyre punctured or what LOL
ReplyDeleteWhat about changing the beer to a healthy chill fruit juice? Then Jo can join in too.
ReplyDeleteWenn : will take note of that
ReplyDeleteIsaac : i agree but it got to start from the family, kan?
Hayley : I thought you guys the black dog society hang out a lot ,, stout and all
Alice : Yes, i do wait for my wife to help her with the pc and all,only i do go for run in the vicinity of my home and that's about 3 to 4 times a week
I think you should be glad that your son gets mad at you for drinking beer :-). Now you know he won't go get himself drunk.
ReplyDeleteYou wife is a lucky woman. How wonderful to have a hubby who is so considerate and realize that after a hard days work, one needs to return to a peaceful and joyous environment at home with all the love ones. This is a great post to remind all of us that we have to be mindful that our selfishness often bring displeasure to love ones around us and I like the title "No Air, No Air" :D
ReplyDeletethe good book has this to say which is very practical." I Peter 3:7
ReplyDeleteHusbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.
stay cool my friend and let everyday be a good day.
Sheoh Yan :together we learn to change, ok?
ReplyDeleteMas : Happy to hear that
STP : Good advice there, i am working towards that direction
Claire : Will do, may be karaoking is cool as well
MnHl : No worries, we learn along the way
use simple words. at least they are easily understood!
ReplyDeletecapricious, ludicrous,... wtf is that?