Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Nobody said it would be easy...................

I was talking to my 13 years old Jovial the other day, i was asking him did he notice that he was turning to be a bit rebellious of late, he nodded and i shared with him my feeling about his growing up.

Of late, i realized that i had to change my own attitude towards this 13 years old boy of mine, i knew it would be hard for me as they say "old habits die hard" as far as i am concerned.

Have gone through some clash of opinions with him that sometimes brought about the heartache to me and resent from him and i also realized that this 13 years old of mine is beginning to manifest in some ways his thoughts, opinions and even his stands.

I have been wrong to certain degree that i disallowed him to express his opinions rightly or wrongly for sometimes his obstinance makes me mad but now i realized that he is just a boy who is trying to bring himself to another level of growing up.

When i read through the comments left by you wonderful readers of mine, i thank you for i was humbled by those opinions and i will continue to learn to be a better father.

Just to share a scene with you guys............ this morning when i woke my 13 years old boy of mine up from bed, as usual i would open my arms to draw him to me so that i could give him a morning hug, to my displeasure he walked pass me without giving me a hug. I wanted to get angry with him but i told myself i loved this boy so much and i would not want him to have his morning quarreling me and i was telling myself hugs and saying " i love you" can wait.

As a father i know discpline will have to be done with the fundamental of love not spur of the moment.

Once again, i thank you guys for all the comments and truly appreciate it for some of you who have brought up children long enough to be able to give me advice and some of you have gone through as teen to help me to reflect of my own handling of my own children. Thank You

P/S : Nobody said it was easy but it doesn't me i have to stop learning

19 comments:

  1. It will be very, very difficult. I can foresee that too in the future. :D

    ReplyDelete
  2. Reach out to him... He may have some issues bottled up inside. Give him a shoulder to cry on... This is the most important time in a boy's life - I've seen many good boys turn bad at this stage in their lives - Form 1 or Form 2, very crucial. Open you eyes, your mind and your heart - he may be reaching out to you for love... Being strict or stern does not equate discipline. Pull, don't push...

    ReplyDelete
  3. listen to STP.. words from an experienced teacher and father of a filial daughter.. :)
    i m still learning like u, Eugene.. and girls can be difficult too... anyway, bringing up kids need efforts and lots of patience, love, kindness, understanding... and goodness knows what else.. :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. When the child was still young, he was so scared that the parents would reject to love him, but when the child has grown up, he rejects the parents' love. I can feel how you felt this morning. Why not to have the mom to talk to him? Let your wife go and talk to him. Tell the son that dad felt hurt this morning.

    ReplyDelete
  5. when it's my turn, I hope I have the right attitude just like you. My father told me, that no one is perfect except God, so there will be times when we parents do imperfect things, but we are only human. I read abt your relationship with your sons and I feel you're doing so much better than most father out there!

    ReplyDelete
  6. agreed with Sheoh Yan, when my son got no patience to listen to me, i will let my husband talk to him. so that he won't think that i am so demanding....

    ReplyDelete
  7. Hi bro,

    I have change my blog name
    pls update
    http://jaslineisabundance.blogspot.com/

    :)

    Jas

    ReplyDelete
  8. be patient, be strong. i love your blog, sumhow preparing me to be a mum one day. lol xD

    ReplyDelete
  9. You are in deed a caring and 'updated' daddy...they are the luckiest to own you as the head of the family..

    ReplyDelete
  10. About your son slipping past you instead of receiving your hug, this reminds me that one day my little boy may one day shun my physical gesture of love when he reaches his teens....hahaha, better enjoy it before it's over.

    ReplyDelete
  11. that age... hemm... not easy i bet

    ReplyDelete
  12. wah...so nice template... geng!!!

    ReplyDelete
  13. I really enjoyed reading the posts on your blog. I would like to invite you to come on over to my blog and check it out. God bless, Lloyd

    ReplyDelete
  14. Wow... you are such a great father, who is able to spend time listening to your boys. On top of that, morning hugs and warm wishes... some how or rather, if I were Jovial I would be a bit apprehensive for these thingy at this age... hugging makes me feel like you are treating em like a 'boy', instead of a 'man'!

    Have a nice day!

    ReplyDelete
  15. His "rebellious" behaviour will pass. He's a teenager growing up. Just be there and bond with him while you can.

    ReplyDelete
  16. lucky for him,he have a very understanding dad :)

    ReplyDelete
  17. bro... u r doing great as a daddy!! :)

    ReplyDelete
  18. hi eugene, how do i find you on facebook?

    ReplyDelete
  19. Thank you guys, i have learnt a bit here and there from all your kind comments

    ReplyDelete