He woke up this morning, looking for his school uniform,he couldnt find it thus he raised his voice "mommy,where is my uniform", I intercepted angrily and said "Jovial,you're 11 now,you need to learn about responsibility, it is your uniform and you will just have to look for it" he looked at me disdainly and i insisted that he looked for it.
I was thinking to myself after this scene,why was my son behaved the way he behaved. Has he been pampered to the degree that at his calling,he requests must be made, or could it be the faults of me and my wife not letting him learning to be independant. Suddenly,i reliazed that,it was me and my wife that due to the love you have for him thus we reduced his chances of learning to be independant.
I dont know about you,i sincerely feel that children must be given some room to make mistakes and the parents should guide them along the way not to repeat the same mistakes. When we are so afraid of letting our children making mistakes,we become overproctective towards the children and that restricts our children from being adventurous in their thinking and attitudes.
As i mentioned in my previous post, i tutor my son alongside with his friend, i realized one common trait in them. These children are not creative in their thinking despite the fact their grammar is ok. I took them to task by giving one experiment, i held out a blue pen and asking them to cite ten descriptions about the blue pen, to my suprise they had to struggle to form words to make the desriptions. May be it is our education system that refrain the children from asking the "stupid questions", from challenging the status quos and from presenting their creative ideas.
So now we know our children are being stereotyped in the class room,therefore we need to make room for them to be creative in our own living room, to juice out crazy ideas, to question the questions,to learn to know that what they hear,read,listen to might not always be right.
P/S, If Wright Brothers never thought we could fly, we never can
uncle eugene,
ReplyDeletei agree la. even me, i get stuck so often to think of some creative ways to handle my questions. one thing is that teacher also do pamper student a lot. even ways to memorize the fact that we should do on our own, they help us think of a simpler way. sometimes, thinking that the old teachers are so much more creative than us.
we are restricted to think out of the box because of the new teachers. as they do is just teach n teach n still teach. they doesn't want the their student to ask stupid question is because they don't even know how to answer.
-neenee-
that is probably the downside to overprotective parents like us (me included). we have that tendency to pamper our kids especially the eldest that they become too dependent on us parents. my eldest is a boy of 11 too. here in the house, he gets to do chores and stuff that trains him to be resourceful, independent and obedient. it is so hard to steer them from their dependence on us probably because they've gotten used to the fact that we are at their beck and call 24/7. start giving his independence now bro. (minimal only). very nice post. have a great weekend ahead... ciao!
ReplyDeletei cannot comment on this as i am still not a parent yet. but i am afraid that i might manja my child as opposed to my wife. she is the more "ganas" one....lol. anyways, it is true that children nowadays are spoon fed, even for my 4 y/o niece. but as always, in a nyonya family, my mom being a grandmother is very strict and teaches discipline the good old ways. she even taught my lil niece to read and write when she was only 3. sometimes, it is good using force but to a certain extend and not to hurt their feelings.
ReplyDeleteas for me, i agree with eugene .. tat most times we tend to pamper our kids that they r dependant at times.. where is that uniform, i hv heard numerous times..now they wont ask me cos they will get this answer.. "look for it with yr eyes, dont just see with yr mouth!"
ReplyDeleteThe other day when the dentist pulled out 2 of my girl's teeth, i was heartbroke.. i ached though she didnt.. i feel the pain though she doesnt know.. i guess this is the difference.. the mum and the child..
Bro, I am having problem opening your site. Must be blogspot problem.
ReplyDeleteOur education system don't encourage students to speak out, just follow instruction.
i usually dont pampered them in helping them to find or get their things, unless they really cant find and pressed for time. I start as young as they are in K1 when they can understand. But is quite difficult especially if they know they can asked for help from someone else.
ReplyDeleteHappy weekend ahead!
:D
The education system needs to change. Too much rote-learning and memorizing, it can make learning in college or universities tough because those places focus on independent learning and creative thinking instead.
ReplyDeleteOhh... my dad kinda spoil me with tutoring me with maths too.... but I'm such a bloke, I NEVER listen. My dad tutored me in maths until I was taking SPM- but I merely passed my maths and failed add maths and physics. LOL...why? Because when he's tutoring me, my mind was somewhere else, imagining things. For me, I'm a bit different from kids who are being pampered that way... it doesn't really affect me much... I have always been a right brain user, so creativity always undermine my logics and rational. And being young and having a strong rebellious streak, I was independent and different in most ways, and gets into trouble with teachers in school because I simply wun shut up from asking questions.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, back to your boy, I believe it's not your fault, but it's our education system's fault where children are not allowed to think creatively to solve problems. So, thinking out of the box and being independent are definitely out of the question...
If you're free, Eugene, you might want to have a look on my older article on what I think of our education sys that's spoiling out children.
Here:
http://cleffairy.wordpress.com/2008/10/03/excelling-in-exam-is-a-priority-thinking-is-not/
Aiyaks, stupid url wun come out...
ReplyDeletehttp://cleffairy.wordpress.com/2008/10/03/excelling
-in-exam-is-a-priority
-thinking-is-not/