Please I need you to share your experiences with me,should you have any in regard with this and this only has been bugging me of late.
I went to see my pharmacist friend last week seeking his advice on this.... You see my Jovial is 14 now,it seems that I have not see the kind of growth in him that I see most in his peers and what my pharmacist told me scared me.
He said that I needed to get him to consume some testerone pills to stimulate his growth and he further cautioned that at 14 he should have reached puberty,if not it will all be to late to spike the growth and when I heard I was like really worried.
And it is because of this grave concern of mine(Jovial's growth)I have had many arguments and quarrels with Jovial,get him to play basket ball,(so so oblige me),get him to eat more nutritious foods,(also not so keen) and sometimes I really feel very frustrated about being a nagging old Papa.
So,when my pharmacist cautioned me about how it would be too late for Jovial to miss his prime of growth,there we broke into many more arguments and quarrels,one part of me say,don't bother,the other part of me saying otherwise.............Sometime I even use unkind words like,"You don't what you like lah, you fat,you short,next time just don't blame me"
P/S : Sometimes I really feel like a damn lousy father
Puberty in boys starts between 10 to 15 years of age. At about two years after the onset of puberty, your boy will experience a growth spurt. He will grow at about 12 cm per year. So your concern is Jo still in short statue? Did you check whether has he started growing hair around the privates and under the armpits?? If yes then he is in his puberty. Well not everyone will make the same changes at the same time right.
ReplyDeleteI really have no knowledge of this, and I do hope that other parents out there can advice you.
ReplyDeleteDon't be frustrated ba Eugene =)
Stay calm a bit and let common sense takes it role for awhile.
I prayed that Jovial will grow up just fine, just like the creator intend him to be.. healthy and blessing to many others. Amen
I think you don't have to worry. Some ppl have slower growth. One of my classmate in secondary school. He's the shortest in the class when in form 3. Then when the last time I saw him (after uni) he's so much taller! Most of the guy's height. So, I guess you don't have to worry much! :)
ReplyDeleteIf you are very concerned, see a doctor for another opinion on this.
ReplyDeleteNot sure what to say here never had this thought before and all those stimulating pills worries me more than the growth of the Jovial. Unless he is the shortest in class and over the years he didn't grow at all then need to do something about it? He may have delayed growth. Why not go for a second or even third opinion from experts.
ReplyDeleteEugene.. not everyone is the same.. some starts early and some late.. one of my son's friend only started puberty at 16..
ReplyDeleteIf your son has show no signs in cracking voice yet, then he has not reach puberty yet.. wait for another year or so...14 is still young..
Eugene,
ReplyDeleteI still remember when I was around Jovial's age I never listen to what my parents say and somehow don't think my parents will ever understand me. So in the end I don't talk much to my parents at that time. So now I am an adult and a mother, i totally understand how y parents felt b4. My advice to you is try SMS, MSN or Fb him about the consequences rather than u lost ur temper in front of him. Or else let other ppl talk to him, ur wife or even ur fren. I mean ask ur fren don talk abt his height obviously la, try find some article or some good example for him. Hence, maybe u should seek doctor instead and see what a doctor say abt his height & let the doctor talk to him. Ur "pharmacist friend" could be wrong, u'll never know.
This is what I find abt growth problem : http://kidshealth.org/teen/diseases_conditions/growth/growth_hormone.html#
ReplyDeleteRead it when u're free... =)
Don't put so much focus on what you want your child to grow up to be that you forget to notice what they are today...
I think it is good to seek opinions from 1 or 2 doctors to give yourself peace of mind. However, I don't think it is a "problem".
ReplyDeleteI have a secondary school classmate who was one of the shortest in class and always sat on the very first row. I really don't know why... but when I met her years later and she's much taller...and became an air hostess!
I agree with Claire, if yoru son has not changed voice, maybe he has not reached puberty. I have a friend's son who's also 14 and just only a few months ago his voice started to crack, and I can see he's growing much taller since than.
It's best to speak to your family doctor and if required, get tests done. Else, there sure is not much to get worried about. Take care :)
ReplyDeleteYes, you are a damn lousy father!
ReplyDeleteJovial is Jovial and you are you. He is not you and you are not him. Let him live his life...and don't keep trying to make him become like you.
My father was a speedboat racer and into sports and so was my brother. My brother graduated with a university degree...and I only had a college diploma. In other words, I was a disappointment to my father. But thankfully, I did not let all that bother me and could put it all behind me and lived my life the best I could...and I can say happily that I did it very well...my way - not the way my father would want me to.
What if one fine day he tells you that he's gay? Are you going to disown him or what? It's his life - let him live it the best he can - guide and don't force...pull, don't push. Whatever it is, he's your son and always will be... Help him live his life the best he can - don't destroy it.
P.S.
You have two sons...like my father. I would tell you that it is a delicate thing. It may not be deliberate or intentional but one may sense that you favour one over the other...and that can hurt...A LOT. I've seen many such cases among my students too, some with very sad consequences. Not all came through it all as well as I did.
Oh gosh, poor guy! Not you but your son. At 14, he is only into his second year of being a teenager and he is being harrassed by his dad about his growth! Give him a break. Give yourself a break too. Let the boy enjoy his childhood. You know what, just be thankful that he is healthy, smart and everything else good about him. Btw, stop saying all those things that you may regret later. Give your boy a hug for me, will you. It is for "I feel your pain".
ReplyDeleteOn the other hand, I empathise with you too, being a parent. Everything will work out, you'll see. Cheer up, Eugene, there are worse things in life.
maybe give it some time or check with proper doctor instead of pharmarcist friend. It's could be harmful if he was to take the pills.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry to read about your "worries'. Your friend the pharmacist may not be 100% correct.
ReplyDeleteIn which we have to know the growth also depends on the genes from the parents. If either parent's family history is short or soever, then you have to admit that your son will be short in future!
But the food intake and the games/activities esp. playing basket helps a lot to higher height!
My parents have 6 boys, myself 2, we didnt even have a single second to worry about the so called staunt growth but we are more worried of not eating enough and getting SICK.
Thus nutritional food is still No. 1 like taking duck cooked in "bak ting" is essentially good for growing children.
Believe in God fully, he will give his grace over your two wonderful boys.
Personally, I think, Papa doesn't need to get all worked up to see Jovial not growing as fast as what is expected of his age. Reason? EVeryone's body will have their own timing. Give you one example - my husband told me that he still haven't reached puberty at 15 yrs old. No broken voice, short and stubby. Then by 16 or 17 yrs old onwards, he shot up like galah panjang! Till today, he's among the tallest guys in office or anywhere. I also heard that one of the members of the boyband New Kids on the Block only had his voice broken at age 17 or 18. So you see, Papa? No need to worry too much. If want to worry, then maybe you should really worry if he is still a kid even at age 18.
ReplyDeleteI liked Suituapui's comments! He is so frank but the decision is still yours. You were just over anxious like any parent. Cool man, don't worry too much as long as he is still healthy is GOOD ENOUGH!
ReplyDelete