My mood was all time low over the weekend due to issue of reunion dinner and how my good intention was badly misinterpreted and distorted.
My intention was for the family to have a simple reunion dinner to foster the bond amongst the family members of which was already not so close and i really thought that a simple reunion could be a time to forgive and forget.
All of us are already in the mid forties(brother and sister alike), sometimes i was just thinking could we just see beyond any misunderstanding rightly or wrongly and start to open ourselves up and embrace one and another like brother and sister should be.
When i was called the unfilial son and not befitting a brother to a sister and i was said to be jealous of one getting the upside than the rest and how i was scorned to be a bad Christian for speaking up the truth, it was just a little to much to handle especially with the CNY just a round the corner.
I am a person with a bigotry teaching of family should always come first no matter what that family should extend help to one another whenever needs arise, it really broke my heart when my sibling bond heading to more damage than otherwise, i tried to come to term with myself that may be some don't think the way i do, it is killing i reckon.
When i broke down in front of my boys, my consolation came from them when my two wonderful boys gave me the pat and hug telling me that "Papa, one day they would understand your intention and to us you are the greatest papa"
Looks like i have to put this malaise to a stop,lest it affects my own family's CNY's....
P/S :Maaf, Zahir dan Batin