She suspects her husband of 15 years is having some kind of illicit affair for he goes out pratically every night till midnight or wee hour in the morning, she secretly checks on his handphone, some questionable names appear....
One day,she cannot contend her suspicion anymore thus she confronts her husband if he is indeed having extra marital affair outside.
He neither denies nor concedes but what he eventually says to the wife is something in my opinion is very very very bad........................
So he says," Even if i bring back woman to our house, what can you do, if you dont like it, you can walk out."
I am not saying who is right or who is wrong, neither it is right for me to judge but for a man to utter such words to a woman, it is indeed the worst of man, there is simply no excuse to say those stuff even in the heat of the moment.
My friend told me this, the marriage eventually hit the rock and subsequently she walked out.
Last night, i was sharing this story with my family,and i felt bad when my eldest told me he was hurt too at times with the words i use when scolding him... God have mercy on me, i shall pray for forgiveness
P/S : Words can heal and kill, only you can make the difference.
Your eldest must accept that what you have done is for his good. Well...sometimes temper flares...but I am sure he will understand it one day.
ReplyDeletei really admire the openness that you have with your children. Well done eugene and i think respecting them enough to share with them issues like these is really the way to bring up your children to become mature and responsible adults in future.
ReplyDeletesometimes kids need to learn facts of life and elders to guide them between right & wrong.... its good to share with them and teach them abt life.
ReplyDeleteYes, bro, not easy to be on the 'older' position espeacially when the values are in conflict.
ReplyDeleteI hv to learn to control my words too when scolding my eldest.. one day she will be old enough to tell me that.
ReplyDeleteIndeed, words can heal or kill. Thinking before we speak and putting ourselves in the other person's shoes do help but alas(!) human nature being such, in a rage, we sometimes speak without thinking and words spoken are not retrievable. Good that your son spoke up so that amends, if any, can be made. As for that couple's relationship, it's most unfortunate things like this do happen. Thanks, Eugene, for sharing the incident for our learning.
ReplyDeletesometimes the tone we used is not right and that might lead to misunderstanding..
ReplyDeleteThe older people always advised: Words that have come out of the mouth can never be put back again. Hurt may be forgiven but not forgotten, so watch your words.
ReplyDeleteProverbs 18:21 says death and life are in the power of the tongue and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof...
ReplyDeleteThe power to build someone up or tear them down We can choose to speak words of encouragment or words that hurts and destroy.
It is so important for us to continue to remind ourselves how our words can hurt and scar someone or we can built up someone.
I am still learning to be slow to speak.
Slow to speak, quick to listen. We are given the spirit of self-control before we can utter bad words.
ReplyDeleteRemember whatever we uttered bad or harsh words, it cannot be return back.
Do not let unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up.
Eph 4:29
last time(not now anymore) i uses words to "pasang" gals or ladies, so word are very powerful.see what Hitler did to his nation,he talks more than he action.
ReplyDeletealways best to communicate..
ReplyDeletewords.... they can either heal u or hurt u. Thus, be selective with the words, though it could be just a casual comment.
ReplyDeletea wise person once said, 'never forget the words said by an angry person for those words come from the heart' (or something like dat :P)
ReplyDeletei take seriously what ppl say during an argument as i know he/she won't say that during normal circumstances out of courtesy but when provoked and in anger, truth comes out and i'll remember those words and take heed..
hrm...yeah..sometimes the wrong choice of words can cause misunderstandings. thank you for sharing. I need to remind myself to control my words....
ReplyDeleteAgree with Angel Bear.
ReplyDelete是该反省了。该注意口气及用词。不然孩子会反感。。。我们从不发觉其实一句冲动的话是会留在听的人的心里，那么那么的久。。。
ReplyDeleteOh dear... my husband likes to use that phrase on my girl too, " I don't want you!" or " You get out of the house" sort of words... I personally think it's cruel and irresponsible, I feel very sorry for your friend!
ReplyDeleteHave a nice day!
I guess we just hv to be more mindful before wrong words are said.
ReplyDelete+Ant+
according to the wise Yoda, anger leads to the Dark Side.
ReplyDeletehow true is that!!!
Thanks guys for the comments, appreciate it
ReplyDeleteMe too, at times, were quite harsh on my children. I am now learning to manage my temper and words that I used.
ReplyDelete"...Even if i bring back woman to our house, what can you do, if you dont like it, you can walk out."
ReplyDeleteOUCH!! He's an idiot!!! Sorry to say.
Anyway, as a parent, refrain from saying things that hurt your child. I've been hurt by my parents' words, and when I tell them, it's like talking to the wall... sad huh? But then, they are conservatives born in the late 30's. Modern parents should not repeat this mistake.