Imagine this, your teen child asking for your permission that he wanted to loaf with his friends at the mamak store, high ends coffe shops the likes of Coffee Beans or Starbucks till late nights, what would your reactons be... " no you cant go, it is very dangerous, you might just get shot in the head" " you might be the innocent victim should there be a gang fight" or " you might be waylaid to the back lane and get robbed or even get killed" so you just cant go out late at night.
Then your teen child said," but dad i am 16 now, i know what i do and i will be responsible for my own safety, and my friend's parents are all right with them hanging out, why can't you respect me and trust that i will know what is right and what is wrong and it is only the camaraderie that i enjoy with my buddies, i wont take drug, i wont booze"
This brings me to one request that was made by my wonderful Jovial to me yesterday, he told me today he would invite his friend over to his house, and after which he asked if it was all right for him and his friend to walk to another friend's house to do some school project.
I was apprehensive at first and kind of reluctant to give in to his request, i shared with him my fears ( about less 2 km walk from my house to his friend's house) i tried to dissuade him, but i could see the eagerness of him trying to so called venture out. He told me he knew what to do and asking me to trust him that he would take care of himself.
Reluctantly, i gave in to him and telling him that i respected his choice but he must learn to take responsibility like calling me when he got out of the house, and calling me again as soon as he reached his friend's house.
I know inadvertently, there will come a time, when my boys are into their teen, doing the teen stuffs, as much as i care for them, i reckon i must in a way trust that they know exactly to tell the difference between the rights and the wrongs, till then i must start teaching the rights and telling them the wrongs.
To me it would not be nice to keep "policing " on them .
As A parent what do you think?
P/S : Rudimentary, Respect is the key, i reckon