I was mad at my eldest son last night, and with his attitude towards his younger brother, i just couldnt stand the intimidating and bullying actions he inflicted upon his younger brother so i argued with him and gave him some tongue lashing, at first he seemed nonchalant towards my lashing and he stood looking disdainly at me, i knew it was doing the both of us no good if i kept talking or raising my voice at him, i could not resort to canning because i promised him at his age i would spare the rod and we just talk to sort things out.
So i decided to call him over to my master room, telling how frustrating and angry i was at him,i paused then i continued telling him my stand about how important i regard brotherhood and family to him, i waited for a while then i decided to ask him to enter his defence (sounds like court in session,doenst it?)
As he was explaining himself and i just kept quiet and listened, when he finished defending himself, i was happy and stunned to hear this statement coming out from him " Papa, i am learning to love my brother" and i gave him a hug and telling him "i love you"
I know my sons are cheeky and i have no problem with that in fact i want them to be cheeky that's the part of growing up but through their cheekiness i am learning to teach them about good attitudes and good values, they can be cheeky but they can never be rude.
I am thankful that my children have no problem confiding in me, and most of the times we would just sit down and talk and talk and talk.
P/S. It is nice to be a parent when we know how it is to be children
i know what u mean.. my 2nd son is still arguing with my youngest daughter too .. on and off... but it is quite harmless.. perhaps it is normal.. they dont keep at heart... part of growing up as siblings...
ReplyDeleteyea actually, its true. fighting and arguing is all part and parcel of learning to love each other.
ReplyDeleteif i never fight or argue with my sis and bro, i wouldnt treasure the RL I have with them now. :)
eugene, keep it up! you're a great dad!
hmmmmm sometimes it's true fighting and arguing is the part of learning how to love someone. but if it's a frequent routine it will turn out something bad. but you should b glad that your sons will confide with u. this is very good indeed as i don't even do it to my parents. even i did, they don't listen. so you are doing good as u are listening to them too!
ReplyDeleteive gotto learn much from you....being a parent and all. you're resorting to the western style of teaching and disciplining. but most asians, or should i say malaysians would be using the rotan, inflicting bodily hurt, which could scar the children both physically and mentally. i for one, was brought up by a typical nyonya and mind you, discipline is very harsh. but we took it positively and turned out ok. and btw, you changed your hairstyle ar......you botak now ar?....lol.
ReplyDeleteBro, you are one super cool dad :)
ReplyDeleteWOW....bro, I gotta learn parenting from you. Must visit this blog often. How old r your sons?
ReplyDeletehaha. this might work on your sons. But, many parents don't practise this.
ReplyDeleteYes, my parents don't. I always argue with my brother and quarell with him. Yet, I still have one brother.
I think the fact is my both mother and father treat us extremely bias. That is why me and my brother hate each other.
But now, we have totally lost interest to fight and quarell.
however, our parents still in bias. But, we don't care..
Ohh, so this is wud happened... i missed this article.. =.=
ReplyDelete