When i scrolled down the comments you guys left in my post in relation to my post title "12th Wedding Endlessly", i particulary loved one comment that edi神 had to say, "have you everthought of having an affair ?" ok, as my blog title suggests, i bold-talk, and i will do you guys injustice if i were to say otherwise...so the answer sure i have.
I was even closed to have a real one played out at certain point of my life, i mean my marriage life, but my consceince is always staked against my guilt that i would have should i fall, and i would always tell myself, that i would not let my wife suffer from some silly things that is not of her wrong doing.
We started out as friend (more like a customer and supplier kind of business relatioship), i liked her, she was nice, she knew that i was married. She would always call me to check how i was doing throughout the day, man even my wife didnt do that, i tell you......hahaha. Gradually, i knew that our cordial friendship was taking another route, untill one day she confessed that she liked me, so here i was caught in between. A girl didnt mind having an underground relationship, and at the same i could still play out my role as good husband and father without their knowledge.
I knew at that point, if i were to be kicking it off, my whole family will be at stake, my entire family will crumble, and i too would lose my sense, losing my respect from my family. I vow over my dead body, i would not allow that to happen, so eventually the whole issue was subdued, and thank god, we are still good friends now, for i had never once in my right senses wanting to take advantage of her.
You might say, we are living in this ultra-modern world, and the value of our living is as such "life's short, just enjoy" and go get some excitements. Well, i too love to have enjoyment, i too love to have bevy of beauties at my expense, but then again, i will be deeply guilty if i were to see my wife suffer in silence.
Once, my wife told me it was ok for me to have affairs provided i could meet all of her material needs., she would ask not less than a BMW 3 series, a full facilities condominium, credit cards that she could sign till her heart's content. Well, lets come clean, even if i could provide whatever she asked for, she still wouldnot be generous enough to share her husband with another woman. (tell me if i am correct to say that)
I know, i was not spared and will not be from falling, but as a responsible husband and father, i must always remind myself, my flesh's desires will not be as dominant as my emotional's satisfaction.
P/S I Love You,,,, my dear