Friday, November 25, 2011

How I wished I'd an answer for her.....

We used to see each other for tea but something was not right,when she stopped calling me for about a month or so, I called her once,twice and a few times in between,just wishing her well but not wanting to know why she was not keen to meet up with me.

Few days ago,I text her her,again wishing her well,she replied likewise and a few days later,she text me,finally inviting me for coffee like we used to,immediately I said "yes" to her cos I treasure her friendship.

I was surprised to the "unusual" her,(cos she is always so chirpy,jovial,positive and lively) but that look of her at that time,sent shock wave to me,she looked so heavily laden with troubles and all chested up with frustrations kind of look and as she finally broke the news to me,she was overwhelmed by tears.

The news was.........her only son of six years old was diagnosed to have suffered from loss of hearing and according to the specialists,the condition was not likely to improve and it might just get worse to total loss of hearing and that's the reason why my dear friend was shunning from most of her friends during that traumatic period.

As she was sharing with me,intermittently still with tears tricking down,she asked me something like this,"Eugene, why must God punish me this way or why God is so envious of me, I have been a good girl all this while and ain't do wrong thing,help as many people as I could, why why why?"

I told her I really did not have an answer to her question and I did share with her too that at one point of my life I used to ask that same question but always to no avail to any answer from God but I told her the important now is to helping her son to understand that her boy is not "abnormal" as other perceive him to be, I told her to give a lot of confidence to the boy.Ditto.

In time like my friend's, as a friend to her,I can't just whip out my magic wane and execute a "Miracle" but as her friend,I must always keep in touch with her, supporting her in most ways that I could and that's is for a very long time, not like,"Today I share your pain, tomorrow I shall refrain"

To you dear friend,Adelyn, be strong ya,remember this "tough time never lasts but tough people do"

P/S : Sometimes I stop asking "HIM" and just let "HIM" do his works


  1. I used to ask this question too.. but after a while, I stop asking as I know I shouldn't doubt HIM. In fact, when I am able to accept the way HE treat me, I am able to get over things with better and positive action and clearer mind. If you don't mind, let me have your friend in my prayers, and I hope she will be able to get through this soon.

  2. my friend used to ask the same to me too..."where is GOD when I needed HIM?" and I sometimes question the same. I had my answers, I found the answers to myself but I wish I can give the same answer to her...

    All I can tell her is to 'think positive, and be grateful for what you still have, instead what you have lost." (which is what I am doing now). It sounds illogical, because what is there to think positive during the hardest time, much more to be grateful!

    Never stop supporting her, and letting her know that she is not alone. I keep her in my prayers too, and hopefully, she will find the answer to her questions and accepting things and to know what God has in store for her.

    Everything happens for a reason, and for sure, God will never give something more than our shoulders cannot carry. Blessed be.

  3. God does not punish us this way.. because this is a fallen world, it has its sufferings and sickness and tears... but throughout these difficulties, we have God with us, in us and for us to help us overcome.. just come..
    Ask ourselves one question.. do we go to God when we need Him.. or do we just stand there and cry, "Why are you punishing us this way, God?"
    Hope your friend will come to Him at this time...

  4. Sorry to hear about this..

    Life is always unexpected.. ups and downs...

  5. When you though you been trap and struck in a situation, HE will lead you to another way.

    身体有缺陷不用紧,只要我们的心态不缺陷他就有无限力量去完成更多的事情.她也不可以继续封闭自己,这样封闭自己, 她的孩子会更自闭!

    Gambateh to your fren.

  6. Sorry to hear about the news but God works in mysterious ways. There's always a reason for everything He does.

  7. Sorry got no answer, perhaps have to accept and live with it and move on.

  8. Hope everythng goes well for your friend.

  9. It is sad to hear that your friend's predicament. It is so true that we don't always have an answer for everything happen to us. As friends, we try to help whenever we can but there are things that it is not within our means so the best we could do is to be a sounding board to our friend. Sometimes, just being there and listen is a big help already. The boy will be fine with lots of love and encourgement from his parents.

  10. You say it best...when you say nothing at all.

  11. Listening to her will do... And pray for her too... I once heard let God takes care of our problem, we just have to go on to live life our best, and trust God (Let Go & Let God)...

  12. sorry to hear the news. I guess we will never be able to answer these sort of questions cause we are not GOD. All we could do is trust HIM and look forward. GOD does work in mysterious ways and when HE closes a door, HE will open a window....

  13. Remember Job in the bible? He never questioned God "why"... but in all things, give thanks. I know it is hard to accept, and my heart goes out to her, but God does love her and her son, and He will never put them through any situation they cannot handle. Bad things does not come from God, but He allows it to happen for reasons unknown to us and beyond our understanding.

    During this time, it is good for you and your lovely Mrs to support her, as she may be staying away from friends for fear of being judged. She needs to be strong for her son, and find the silver lining.

    Footsteps on the beach. He is carrying her through.

  14. yeah eugene I used to ask the same question to HIM too but I think I'm not deserved to ask HIM. I know everything happened for a reason..

    To Adelyn, I hope she will be stay stong and keep faith in HIM

  15. Be strong, Adelyn... Your boy will be alright. The one above will do his best and guiding you in growing up your small hero.

  16. Eugene,
    Life is full of questions and we don't always have the answer. Just stay as a friend and be with her whenever you can. Of course keep her in your prayers. I am sure she will appreciate your presence and there for her.

  17. haduih! cubaan besar ni...
    But believe in God.. HE must have a better plan to her and her kid..
    tapi yalah...berat mata memandang, berat lagi bahu memikul..
    May She'll stay strong during this period..
    as a friend, it is important to be there for her... just by asking how is she, it will comfort her.

  18. Thank you guys for your kind words