Tuesday, November 22, 2011

After the run,,,a beer and felt like crying

I did my two and half hours run just now,went out for dinner alone,drowned a bottle of beer,(beer always tastes so heavenly after a "hard run"), came back,turned on the computer,literally vegetating in front of it,suddenly was caught up with my emo,when I went to my sister in law Facebook page.

There was a picture of my lovely wife and her siblings having good time,I got rather jealous of them, four of them bonding so well as compared to my own siblings,we are like drifting so far apart,despite staying in near proximity.

I really don't know why?,I long for a good bonding with my siblings like my lovely wife's but it seems to me that my longing always eludes me,I have tried my best to but it has always been futile,so much so until I'd lost hope of seeing myself clicking so closely with my own siblings.

Out of a sudden,I felt so sad,thinking of the time when I was not even invited to my own brother's wedding a few years ago,(my mom told me that it was only a small family affair)but was I not part of the family? I asked,I have never treated my brother badly,why I was not invited to his wedding, why why why?

My lovely wife used to tell me to let it go,whenever I share my sadness about me not having a good bonding like she with hers and I guess after a hard run,after a beer, I am really letting it go.

P/S : May be one day,may be


  1. I guess sometimes its hard to try and bridge the gap that divide us in a family but we have to try our best.

    I think I know how you feel. Being in a boarding school since I was 13 made me quite "unfamiliar" with my siblings. Sometimes, I even feel that my parents forgot about me as one of their child. :(

    Don't be feeling too down, Eugene. The main thing is we try our best.

    By the way, that sounds like a good run you had, with beer as a treat after. :)

    Stay cheerful. Your family will be back soon and you'll be jovial again. ^^

  2. Beer?!!!!beer taste like a bitter gourd Plus,I hate foam Plus,water is better Plus,too much beer can lead to肝硬化which is bad

  3. So,don't drink beer excessively Friendly advice

  4. marvell, i totally agree with you as i m not the supporter for alcohol also. :)

  5. Is that Marvell your son who commented? Eugene.. sometimes we do not have answers to our questions.. all we need is to let them go... decision is not ours and some questions is better left unanswered to save us from deeper bitterness.

  6. It is hard to let go sometimes (sadness), try to think less about it. Maybe focus on your wife and family then your parent side? :)

    You can do it 1! 1 person cannot cover the whole sky, it needs some other people hands too mah.

  7. Just wondering, how come you're not invited to a wedding in your missus' side of your family as well?

  8. You have tried your best hold your head high touch your heart and be proud of it. Sometimes its the chemistry about siblings or friends moreover is it the half/step bro you are referring to for not inviting you to the wedding? We need to understand the complication of the adults as they would not want to complicate the complication..Bananaz sounded so complicated here right better stop now haha. Not to worry some would say its karma..cheers!

  9. Quote: beer always tastes so heavenly after a "hard run".

    Eugene, you sound like what Japanese always say after a tough day at work while drinking beer. Well, except yours is hard run :)

    Marvell, I second that!

  10. Don't feel bad, it really need the "click" in between the sibling. Sometime we are able to click well with this sibling but not the other. No matter how hard we try, it just dun work. You can't make that work but you can help your sons both bonding well so that they are close with each other when adulthood.

    Oh yes listen to Marvell, dun drink beer try some isotonic drink. Cheers bro.

  11. Oops! So sorry for the above comment. I should have phrased it differently. My fault, a thousand apologies. I was wondering why you did not go to attend the wedding in the family. If you can recall, I went all the way to Penang twice to attend to attend my nieces' wedding. Wouldn't want to miss the chance to go and share the joys...

    I guess it's because you want to stay back for the Penang Bridge Run...and I wouldn't be able to understand your passion since I'm not a sports guy.

    So sorry to offend you, please forgive me.

    Ooooo....Marvell is sooooo sweet. Do listen to him - don't drink! Ummm...or maybe only on special occasions like when we go karaoke together, LOL!!!

  12. Oh dear, that must have hurt, bad. But, the good thing is, it's over and you can choose to forget it and get on with your life though it can still sting a little every time it comes to mind.

    Just like the monk who left the woman after crossing the river, the burden (pain) can be left behind.

    I believe everything happens for a reason, Eugene. For one, this incident instills in you the importance of inculcating closeness among your own family. See, even your Marvell is here showing concern. This should make your day, eh?

    Life is such, cruel sometimes but that's the reality we have to live with. No matter, this too shall pass. Cheer up, with or without beer. LOL

  13. Lina : Thanks, I keep running and forget about the blues.

    Marvell : Thank you for your concern son,,love you, it is just that suddenly papa feels sad ma

    Claire : will do,

    STP : Don't worry about it,okay,"I was not even invited,lest asked" hahahah

  14. I bet you miss your family alot ya, hence the thinking....
    You are a family guy tat's why you care/sensitive to siblings and family. That's a good thing. :)

    Just let them go...your thought that matters.

    I have a brother too. An older one but our relationship sucks! Although both of us staying in kl but we hardly meet up errr....no, we didnt meet even once. We just...didnt click with each other.

    I felt the same too whenever my hubby ask me "Hey, how's your brother now?" and I answer "I dont know"....

  15. Beer is not the solution - alwiz will be! Bro, don't be so upset ya. Just let it go and think of something that makes u happy!

  16. Marvell is such a sweet and caring boy. I love his "friendly advice" to you.

  17. Hmm, your wife is right. Sometimes we really need to let go.. Look forward!

  18. Maybe ur bro is jealous that u are more popular than him? Anyway, just let it be... I too haven't talk to my sis for many yrs until we are both married and because of our kids bring us back together again.

  19. I have never had any quarrel with any of my siblings, so i know not your feelings. but i love my siblings too much, i know hw hurt i will b if we are to fight and drifting. =(

    i dont know what happened between you guys but i pray that one day you guys will be happy and bonding again.

    Good luck.