Friday, March 26, 2010

I am happy and i am sad

Have you ever experienced a mixture of two contrasting feeling at the same time ? A fusion of it at one hand sending you sky high and on the other hand the other feeling giving you crash boom bang. I had, in fact just yesterday experienced both, so the story goes.......................

The happy side...... My lovely wife called me yesterday, sounded very happy over the phone, cheekily she told me that she had received an official letter of her salary increment, she asked me if i could guess how much the she got for the leap, my guesses all hit blank. Excitedly she told me, she got so much higher than she expected, and i was really happy for her and i really thank God for the blessing upon me and my family.And this morning she coaxed me into buying a new care and i said hold on hold on but tonight we will celebrate.

The sad side...........I had a row with my mother last night, you see my eldest sister is getting married next month again, albeit the second time, the matter of factly is my mother is not too fond of her husband to be, and my sister's heart desire is to see my mother being there on her wedding dinner in way signalling the blessing upon the marriage.

Being as obstinate as she can be, i was rather pissed off with her when i asked her if she would attend the wedding, and her reply was " see how lah, when times come i will let you all know"
Despite her non speaking term with my sister, my sister had indeed verbally in person invited her to the wedding, and the " see how lah" answer was the answer.

I told my mother off last night, i let her know how painful it could be for a daughter to have a wedding without the presence and the blessing from the parents, and as far as my mother is concerned, her only valid reason she not attending is simply she feels ashamed that her daughter is getting married the second time.

I got even angrier with her, if that was her sole reason, i told her as a matriach in the family she should not practise " Double standard" One child do this ok, another doing the same thing cannot, one grandson doing this ok, another child of her doing this cannot. What nonsense is she talking about and i hanged up on her. In the family i am labelled as kind of vigilante,(minus taking the laws into my own hands) but i just hate and loathe people practise "DOUBLE STANDARD"

Please fill in the blanks for me.......today i am a bit morbid despite my favourite day Friday.

Happiness is_________________
Sadness is __________________

Happy Weekend guys ,no matter what family first......

P/S : Let us not fill our heart with hatred for it will send us down to the abyss of sorrow..

28 comments:

  1. Happiness is being with my gorgeous family.

    Sadness is when I think i've done them wrong.

    You're doing a great thing with the family situation Eugene, just perservere with it all. And well done your lovely wife for the increment!

    Have a lovely Friday!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Congrats on the good news your wife got.... About the other situation, your mother is WRONG. She needs to support her daughter --even if she disapproves. I'm 67--and raised 3 sons. Kids don't always do what we want them to do. We raise them the best way we can --and then let them go to live their own lives. I hope your mother changes her mind.

    Have a nice weekend.
    Betsy

    ReplyDelete
  3. Happiness is when everything goes on smoothly...
    Sadness is when they don't..
    and most of the time we have a mixture of both.. happiness and sadness..that is the package.
    About yr mum, give her some time, sometimes old ppl very hard to change their character.. old habits die hard or should i say, pride.. but i think she will go..

    ReplyDelete
  4. Happiness is a state of mind
    Sadness is also a state of mind..

    Happiness in layman term is heaven, sadness in simple term is hell. Who created them? Who is in control? YOU!!!!tQ

    ReplyDelete
  5. Aiyor...don;t worry, be happy! Don't lah gaduh...gaduh all the time. Old people can be very stubborn - best to jsut let them be. Wah...your missus increment kah? Like that, can belanja me big makan if I go to Penang? Hehehehehe!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Happiness is waking up in the morning and finding out that our loved-ones are still very much with us.

    Sadness is realising the impermanence of everything.
    +Ant+

    ReplyDelete
  7. I think your mother will somehow attend the ceremony. She also want "face". If she dont attend all relatives will ask her why then she will "loose face".

    ReplyDelete
  8. happiness is when ur loved ones are with you no matter what

    sadness is when i feel i've been betrayed by ppl i trust.

    Hang in there eugene, it's good to talk some sense to ur mum, hope all will turn out well.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I agree with Banana.. it's just a state of mind.
    Well, perhaps just let your mom chooses whether she wants to attend or not. Then no problem/conflicts..

    ReplyDelete
  10. Happiness is when i receive my increment as well :-)

    sadness is too many that it can;t filled the blanks here...

    anwyay, happy weekend to you & family..Cheers

    ReplyDelete
  11. Happiness is when every thing falls in place.

    Sadness is when every thing goes wrong.

    ReplyDelete
  12. happiness is when my lover fetch me for lunch and says i love u.

    sadness is when my boss never appreciate my work.

    ReplyDelete
  13. happy when i do what i love n sad when people don't appreciate what i did.

    ReplyDelete
  14. When it comes to parents and their pride... as their child we cant really do much, especially if they are those old fashion type.

    not to say that how they reacted to certain matter is wrong but its how they were raised to believe and they have been holding on to it for so long.

    at this point, all you can do is to show how happy your sis really is with her soon-to-be husband.

    words of confirmation will never work for them... perhaps visual confirmation can help.

    All the best and congrats to your sis ^^

    ReplyDelete
  15. *roll eyes* Matriarchs! No matter what the daughter do she won't be happy la. *snort* like that how? if I'm your sister... i wouldn't gv a damn. All is fair in love and war, Eugene. your mother ought to stop making people do what she want! It won't work. Parents-children relationship does not work that way. Parents-children relationship must have give and take, and it must be unconditional. If your mum can't do that, then it is her lost, not your sister's. I am harsh. So be it. Sometimes, people needs some knock in the head! They are old doesn't mean they know best. Nobody knows best. Only God knows best. I believe God intended your sister to marry, and who is your mother to disapprove?

    I am a daughter myself. I won't be taking sides, this is your family issue, but then again, "Fuck you" is what I had in mind for such parents. If one truly care, they would support the children's decisions, and it doesn't matter if they think the children is making a mistake. Children should be given a chance to make their own life, own mistake... not live what their parents wants them to do!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Happiness strikes me when my kids are happy, healthy and wise!

    Sadness is when my kids get my nerves on...and drive me crazy(weep)!

    Congratulation of your wife's increment! Cheers!!

    I have a hunch that your mom will attend the wedding. Wishing your sister a happy marriage, and hoping her life together will be rich in joy and love!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Congrats to your wife! And congrats to you for sticking up for your sister! It is best to speak up then to just let one loved one hurt another without being confronted. Good for you and your sister! I have been at the same end of my mother's 'disowning' more than once because I didn't do what my mother told me to or not to. And I'm 47... "sad that grandma still tries to dress you" my son's would say. HaHa and they were so right even at young ages. It felt good when my own brother stood up for me and of course when I finally stood up for myself a few years ago.

    Great post and writings! Glad to be following you back! Have a Great weekend!
    Hugs,
    Coreen

    ReplyDelete
  18. Goodness....hmmm...I really don't know what to say. Let us cross our fingers and hope that your mother will attend bro. :D

    ReplyDelete
  19. Happiness is I get what I want.

    Sadness is I can't get everything I want.

    Just let it be, give time your mum to think about it!

    ReplyDelete
  20. sometime there is just so much we can do ,, chill bro

    ReplyDelete
  21. Parent should give blessing to the children,more still they are old adults now, or parents stand to regret it later,,

    john

    ReplyDelete
  22. hope your mum will eventually calm down a bit. i guess she feels a "loss of face" to attend the 2nd wedding, but if she doesn't attend, let her be. as the vigilante, the onus is then on you to give your blessings (even if you don't feel like it...heh heh!)

    ReplyDelete
  23. i knida agree wif cleffairy...i would have go ahead n marry anyway. i m sorry that u cant accept it but i also cant live ,y life based on ur opinion anymore...my 2 yens :)

    ReplyDelete
  24. Hapiness is like a bed of roses

    Sadness is to bear with the thorns.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Happiness- all family members happy

    Sadness- something bad happen to family member

    ReplyDelete
  26. happiness is without having to look for happiness.happiness is transitory in nature.many mistake pleasuer for happiness.material things status,intoxicants etc give you temporary pleasure but not happiness,humans try to subsitute all manner of pleasure for happiness.if one is happy, such pleasures are redundant.happiness is elusive like trying to fill a leaking pail with water.

    ReplyDelete
  27. sadness is sliding on a big razor blade with your testicles as brakes.i have a mum like yours ,who not only practice doubble standards but triple.she will treat all her children and grand children according to her whims and fancy according to moods,preference,financial strength and sibbling alliances.she will always favour a certain child who marries a millionaire.the other children are not favoured because they marry wage earners.if i were to be your sister i wont care to hoots and i will ask her to fly kite whether she attends my wedding .cos it is my special day and i want to be happy.i wish i have a vigilante brother like you who seeks the truth and justice .

    ReplyDelete