Monday, May 10, 2010

Mother's Day......... So what?

This is something worth a thought i reckon in retrospect to all the hyped up Mother's Day celebration that we all so religiously celebrated yesterday,,(the 2nd Sunday of May)

"His mother left him and his brother when they were 7 and 5 years old respectively for another man, leaving his father with two boys, they never felt nor experienced what mother's love was all about.

Eventually the mother came back wanted to make amend with the children when he was 18 years old, he recalled he met his mother at one coffee shop and he was not excited about it and the mother told him back then that she would come to see her again, he remembered his mother telling him that she was sorry but then again there was also the last time he met her, untill now. 17 years apart."

My friend never wanted to know why his mother left the family but he's always wanted to know how could his mother leave the two boys of whom she carried in her womb for so many months and cared for for so many years before she eluded them no matter what the circumstances were back then, he just wanted to know that.

I asked him would he forgive her if she came back to him now and wanting to make amend once again, to reunite with them (now that their biological is dead) would he long for the lost bonding akin to mother and the son. He said he rather prefer that she would never return for he said he had hated her but he would choose just to forget her. "

And to my friend, Mother's Day is just another day that he wished he could have the answer for a question that has stayed with him for the past over 40 years

You know sometimes i too feel like lecturing my own mother for her bias actions but it's always pained me whenever i done that, i know i rather have a not so perfect mother than no mother at all. And i still can remember what sacrifices she'd made for the family....

P/S : At this point can we forgive and forget ? Happy Belated Mother's Day


  1. it is not Happy Mother's Day for everyone huh!

  2. maybe she has her own foo-choong.. if i were him, i ask her straight, to release the hatred and grudge inside...

  3. i have no right to comment as i am not treated my MIL in special way also...sometime,its not the matter of forgiving or not, but just can't stand if she keep on create problems... i know i am bad...i know...but i just look for simple life....sorry...

  4. agree with Claire. Maybe she have her reasons. No one would leave their children willingly

  5. There are always 2 sides to a story. It is not an easy thing to part with our own kids. It must have been hard for her too. I would agrre with Claire to ask her directly just so that I will not have any regrets

  6. auww sorry to know this. am agree with claire too, will ask her the real reason. :)

    but for sure, happy mother's day to ur wife yea!

  7. Forgive...and ye shall be forgiven! Nobody's perfect, people make mistakes...but if they realise it and want to make amends, they should be given the chance. Hatred and anger is like a poison...that will eat into a person and consume one's whole well-being.

  8. bro...the purpose of having mothers day, father's day, labour day, valentines day ..and etc... is for one purpose..... besides the commercialism by the shopping centres, it's about recognition. recognition the good things these folks have done for us, no matter big or small.

  9. I don't knowlah, if I'm your friend, would I able to forgive my mother?

    I think your friend's mother has her own reason to leave.

  10. Hope u had a great Mother's Day thanking ur mum and ur wife for being great mums!

  11. *sigh* Looks like I must paste serenity prayer over here again. LOL... here you go, bro.

    God grant me the serenity
    to accept the things I cannot change;
    courage to change the things I can;
    and wisdom to know the difference.

    Living one day at a time;
    Enjoying one moment at a time;
    Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
    Taking, as He did, this sinful world
    as it is, not as I would have it;
    Trusting that He will make all things right
    if I surrender to His Will;
    That I may be reasonably happy in this life
    and supremely happy with Him
    Forever in the next.

    Everything happens for a reason. If your friend is not willing to ask his mum what happened, then there;'s nothing anyone can do to help his situation. Ask him, to hold his peace, and I hope God grant him serenity for the things he cannot change.

    But for what it's worth, life is too short to hold grudges like that, especially with his own mother. Nobody is perfect. Everyone makes mistake. Dare he say he never made mistake before? Forgive if he can. Forget, if he can.Unless he can do that, he can't have peace with himself.

    And as for MIL... i try to stay clear from her. Else, i'd be asking for trouble... or worst, divorce, cuz she made me feel like a lesser wife or mum.

  12. Such a sad story but there's always 2 sides to a story. Her act could be unforgettable but probably forgiveable? After all, we only have ONE mom...

  13. Well this one is a toughie and it varies from one person to the other. Some might be able to forgive, some might not - end of the day it's how you're okay with your actions/decisions.

  14. This is very sad. She should have never left her children at such a small age. But maybe, she had her reasons for it and now wants to come back and give all the love she couldn't for 17 years...:)

    Have a good day!

  15. ooo.. my mum told me the other day .. "too bad u're not a boy. Otherwise your bro won't be so Tak Chik - cos he is the only boy". Ah.. my fault for being a girl. oh whatever.... i still go back and bring her for fkc.

  16. some fathers are also like that,so i think these whole thing is okay - baleng. my neighbour's father left his kids while they were still in their primary schooling,and came back to cari his kids after more than 20 years - to minta sympathy/ampun.the kids just treat him as "uncle",no fatherly's feeling after so long hiatus .

  17. blood is thicker than water. watever family feud dat happened, try to make amend before it's to late. hope ur friend will find the answer to his questions. cheers dude.

  18. i'd be sad. to accept a mother after 18 years really a big decision. maybe, after all... i will still accept. i don't know.

    yep, better to have a mother, then no mother at all :(

    i've few friends who have no mother, and the life is very different from others... of course.

  19. I agreed with STP, may your friend forgives his mum... afterall, none of us is prefect in this world!

  20. wah sorry for my late visit, just got busy with the 2010 Presidential Election today.(haha my first time to vote!! just excited!^_^).

    By the way, Blog Idol just got started earlier today, you can cast your vote now, at Bluedreamer's Top Five

    Thanks a lot for participating!

  21. where got such mothers one? to leave their kids? i know tendency is the male leave the kid..but a mother...something wrong