Wednesday, February 24, 2010

I am frustrated.............

They were two missed calls appeared on my mobile early this morning (6.55am), the reason i missed the calls was because i went for a run, came back i returned the call, it was my EX brother in law,(yes my EX brother in law).

He was lamenting to me that my sister (his ex wife) was having a row with her partner, blah blah blah blah and more blah blah blah blah and more blah blah. I said ok and i told him i would give a call to my sister to find out what was wrong.

To be very frank i was frustrated and i am still frustrated about this issue of adults behaving in the ways that they should not be behaving. You messed up your own marriage, you put the children in quandary, in a limbo and you thought that's was all good in getting even with each other.

Now what? you suddenly realized that oops i should not have let my children gone through this nonsense that we adults put them through, trying to make amend and again you try to come to another solution, or more solutions.

In this silly melee of the adults, the biggest losers are always the children, they are at the mercy of the adults, "now you follow the mother or now you follow the father" that kind of stuff.

Come on, if the adults are no good in spending our lives together, let us choose to end the marriage amicably and let us put the welfare and the sense of security of our children our utmost priority.

I am damn frustrated........for i always feel very sad seeing children suffer emotionally,mentally or sometimes even physically at the expense of the adults,they are really helpless and fragile ...........................

P/S : The onus of a parent is to proctect the young


  1. I understand that situation... my dad left me and my siblings as well... it sucks really... it is worse when mom have to single handedly bring us all up.

    I would get frustrated too and maybe even give such person who would do it to my friends or family a piece of my mind.

  2. Spot on. I think parents should go right to the ends of the earth, explore EVERY avenue possible, before even thinking about divorce! That should almost never be an option, else where is the sanctity of marriage.

    True, not all marriages are made in heaven, but instead of pointing fingers, both should really work hard to keep it together, especially when there's children involved.

    Marriage is not about a relationship between husband and wife, but children too, guess some may be a little too selfish to realize.

  3. look at the bright side. it's obvious you hold a pivotal role in your family - people come to you with their problems & hope you have the solutions.

    that's good. you now have the responsibility to exert your good influence & hopefully provide a happy outcome to the issues.

  4. Proof that maturity doesn't come with age. Sounds weird that your EX bro-in-law still confides in you. You must be very trustworthy. :)

  5. i see & hear this all the time... i think they are so caught up with themselve that they forgot that the kids need them more together.

  6. marriage life can be very complicated.

  7. Marriage is a lot of constant hard work. I've been married for just over 5 years, that's really not too long. But to be honest, i wouldn't have made it this far if not for God's intervention in my marriage. Ecclesiastes 4:12 was written for me...."a triple-braided cord cannot be easily broken". Meaning, God is the 3rd strand holding my husband and i together.

    I agree with Doc's comments above. If your family members confide in you, you have "something" they don't. Way to go, Eugene!!

  8. We are afterall, human beings.

    Adults are allowed to make mistakes. Our mistakes will make us stronger to guide the younger ones to the right directions.

    It's unforgivable for adults to make the same mistake all the time because some children look up to them. But there are some children who came from family that are well provided in love, protection and understanding won't appreciate that.Simply, each one of us has our own built-in character that being born with.

    Your EX broinlaw made that very first mistake, and he's kancheong now.

    There's always a first time!

  9. yeah, adults should be responsible for their children. these r the people who makes the little ones suffered. Selfish folks!

  10. Yes, always be very sure when u tie the know and keep to ur committments, it's easier said than done though. All marriages needs both partners to work hard in keeping it alive and strong.

  11. Yes, marriage will be complicated if it is caused by two genders who have fall out of love for one another..
    anyway, hope the kids will grow up fine..

  12. something is going very wrong in the marriage dept and i wonder why...

  13. It's very sad when people just give up on what they used to believe, marriage most of all. Like you said, it's the kids caught in between who pay the most. Hope everyone involves will come into senses and see the hurt and pain they've caused to all. Take care Eugene, I think you might need a lot of emtionl strength for this one.

  14. Husband and wife should always find ways to resolve their problems. :D

  15. i feel damn frustrated about this issue as well. SIEN ar...

  16. Well, Manglish... when it's not time to get married, then just be single. Now I know it's not true there's a woman for every man.

    If you want to get married, make sure you know your other half (and their parents) well. However, be prepared for some surprises a few years down the road when you suddenly realise that your other half is not what he or she you thought ought to be. THAT will be the ultimate test of your patience, tolerance and undertanding :)